“We all hated Louie”

The Stars Hollow Revolutionary Battle Re-Enactors tell Luke that they don’t want to attend Louie’s funeral the next day because they hated him.

Louie always had a scowl on his face, and never said anything nice. He blew smoke from his cigar into people’s faces, and then spit after each puff. He repeatedly hit on Cy’s (crank in the hat) wife, until she lost interest in her favourite soap operas. He kicked Kirk’s pet dog Toto, and after that her mind was affected, so that she couldn’t fetch any more, but just lay down and went to sleep. He never participated in town functions, and when the battle re-enactors gathered (including his own brother, William), he’d throw rock and small tools at them. Unmarried and without children, he was a loner, and only got meaner with age.

When he retired to Florida, the town threw a big party to celebrate (somehow Luke never heard about this big party). Cy made love to his wife that night as never before, and Kirk’s dog gave a happy bark and died, as she was quite elderly by that stage.

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