Xanadu

FRANCIE: This is Xanadu-levels of insane.

Xanadu, 1980 musical fantasy film directed by Robert Greenwald, and based on the 1947 film Down to Earth. Olivia Newton-John stars as Kira, a mysterious woman who is actually one of the Nine Muses from Greek mythology, while Michael Beck is a struggling artist who falls in love with her, and opens a nightclub called Xanadu with a former big band orchestra leader, played by Gene Kelly in his final role.

The film was savaged by critics and was a box-office bomb, helping to inspire the creation of the Golden Raspberry Awards (The Razzies) – Robert Greenwald won the inaugural Worst Director at the Razzies that year. However, the movie’s soundtrack album, featuring music mainly by Olivia Newton-John and Electric Light Orchestra, was a huge commercial success, with the songs “Xanadu” and “Magic” both going to #1. The film has since become a cult classic, and it was adapted into a successful Broadway musical in 2007.

Mr Christian

PARIS: Any questions, Mr. Christian? I mean, Mr. Hunter.

Paris refers to Fletcher Christian (1764-1793), master’s mate on board HMS Bounty during Lieutenant William Bligh’s voyage to Tahiti during 1787–1789. In the mutiny on the Bounty, Christian seized command of the ship from Bligh on 28 April 1789. Some of the mutineers were left on Tahiti, while Christian, eight other mutineers, six Tahitian men and eleven Tahitian women settled on isolated Pitcairn Island, and Bounty was burned.

Fletcher Christian was portrayed by Clark Gable [pictured] in the 1935 film version and Marlon Brando in the 1962 film version, both adpated from the 1932 novel, Mutiny on the Bounty, by Charles Nordhoff and James Norman Hall.

Paris is saying that Mr Hunter was mutinous in his support of Francine.

Ginger Spice

PARIS: Well, there was no way I was letting the class gift be a stupid tree just so Ginger Spice can have her Barbie dream prom.

Geraldine “Geri” Horner, nee Halliwell (born 1972), British singer, songwriter, author, and actress. She rose to prominence in the 1990s as Ginger Spice, a member of the girl group the Spice Girls. Their slogan “girl power” was most closely associated with Halliwell, and her Union Jack dress from the 1997 Brit Awards also became an enduring symbol. Halliwell left the Spice Girls in 1998, citing exhaustion and creative differences, but rejoined when they reunited in 2007.

Connecticut Daughters of the Mayflower

PARIS: Wadsworth Mansion is owned by the Connecticut Daughters of the Mayflower. Most of those biddies couldn’t negotiate an icy sidewalk much less a contract. Took me about five minutes on the phone to get them down to half their asking price.

The Connecticut Daughters of the Mayflower is a fictional organisation. The nearest real world equivalent would be the The General Society of Mayflower Descendants, commonly called the Mayflower Society. It is a hereditary organisation of individuals who have documented their descent from at least one of the 102 passengers who arrived on the Mayflower in 1620 at what is now Plymouth, Massachusetts. The Society was founded at Plymouth in 1897, and there is a Connecticut branch in Hartford, which has both male and female members.

In real life, the Wadsworth Mansion is owned by the city of Middletown, and there is no negotiation of fees for the venue.

Jerry Garcia

PARIS: Why does one pinhead always have to vote for Jerry Garcia?

Jerome “Jerry” Garcia (1942-1995), musician best known for being the principal songwriter, lead guitarist, and a vocalist with the rock band Grateful Dead, which he co-founded and which came to prominence during the counterculture of the 1960s. He was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1994 as a member of the Grateful Dead.

He had already passed away at this stage, so the votes for him as commencement speaker were definitely jokes.

Eloise at the Plaza

PARIS: I knew that suggestion box was a bad idea. Watch Choate get Joan Didion while we’re being read “Eloise at the Plaza”.

Paris refers to Eloise: A Book for Precocious Grown-Ups, a 1955 book by Kay Thompson, illustrated by Hilary Knight. Originally marketed to adults, in 1969 it was released as a children’s book as Eloise, with no changes to the text or illustrations.

Eloise is a mischievous six-year-old girl who lives in the penthouse of the Plaza Hotel in New York City with her nanny, pet pug dog and pet turtle. Thompson based Eloise on an imaginary friend she had in childhood, although it has been speculated that her goddaughter Liza Minelli may have been a possible model. There are several books in the Eloise series, but Eloise never ages. In April 2003, a Disney television film was broadcast called Eloise at the Plaza, with Sofia Vassilieva in the title role.

A fan theory, which you may take with as many grains of salt as you wish, is that Louise was named after the character Eloise. I cannot think of any way that could be confirmed or denied, but it doesn’t seem that implausible. Louise and Eloise both have blonde hair, are rich and spoiled, rather bratty, and have unavailable, neglectful parents.

Kay Thompson died in 1998, so could not have been the commencement speaker, and famously hated her fans, so would be unlikely to agree to it anyway. Hilary Knight is still alive, but it doesn’t seem likely that he would have done it either.

Joan Didion

PARIS: Watch Choate get Joan Didion …

Joan Didion (1934-2021), journalist and author, considered one of the pioneers of New Journalism, along with such figures as Tom Wolfe and Hunter S. Thompson. Didion’s career began in the 1950s when she won an essay contest sponsored by Vogue.

Her writing in the 1960s and ’70s focused on the counterculture, Hollywood lifestyle, and Californian culture and history. In the 1980s and ’90s, her writing concentrated on the subtext of political and social rhetoric. In1991, she wrote the earliest mainstream media article to suggest the Central Park Five, previously discussed, were innocent.

She won the 2005 National Book Award for her memoir about the year following the death of her husband, The Year of Magical Thinking. In premiered as a Broadway play in 2007. In 2013, she was awarded the National Humanities Medal by President Barack Obama.

At this time, Didion had just won the St Louis Literary Prize in 2002, and had recently released her 2001 book of essays, Political Fictions. Her essays on the history and culture of California, Where I Was From, was due to be published in September 2003.

Joan Didion was the first woman to give the commencement address at the University of California in 1975, which is presumably why Paris thinks of her. Her address began with a few charming anecdotes about her own youth, before she launched into a blistering attack on her generation in the 1960s, and its refusal to face up to reality.

A quote from the speech that I think Paris would have warmed to:

“Planting a tree can be a useful and pleasant thing to do. Planting a tree is not a way of life. Planting a tree as a philosophical mode is just not good enough.”

There is no record of her giving a speech at Choate at any time, so it seems as if they didn’t get her after all.

Choate

PARIS: I knew that suggestion box was a bad idea. Watch Choate get Joan Didion …

Choate Rosemary Hall, often known as Choate, a private, co-educational, preparatory boarding school in Wallingford, Connecticut. Choate is currently ranked as the second best boarding school and third best private high school in America.

Founded in 1890, it took its present name and began a co-educational system with the 1971 merger of The Choate School for boys and Rosemary Hall for girls. Its alumni include many members of the American political elite, including John F. Kennedy.

Choate was the inspiration for Chilton, Rory’s school in Gilmore Girls, even though it is in Wallingford, not Hartford. Just to confuse things further, the show gave Stars Hollow the same zip code as Wallingford. In this episode, Paris makes it seem as if Chilton and Choate are rival schools.