DORIS: How dare you sneak out like that, you sniveling little pond scum sample! I should call Erin Brockovich to bring a lawsuit against your parents, you steaming lump of toxic waste!
Erin Brockovich (born Erin Pattee in 1960), legal clerk, consumer advocate, and environmental activist who, despite her lack of education in the law, was instrumental in building a case against Pacific Gas & Electric Company (PG&E) involving groundwater contamination in a town in California with the help of attorney Ed Masry in 1993.
Their successful lawsuit was the subject of the Oscar-winning 2000 film, Erin Brockovich, starring Julia Robert and Albert Finney. Since then, Brockovich has become a media personality and legal consultant.
DORIS: [on answering machine] Dwight, hi it’s Doris. Doris, your wife, remember me? The woman who was asleep in bed when you snuck out the window like a spineless little worm!
It turns out that Dwight isn’t in fact separated or divorced from his wife, but climbed out of the window while she was asleep. As he moved to Stars Hollow and bought a house, that’s a very serious escape attempt!
This does raise more questions, such as where did Dwight get the money to buy the house without Doris noticing, how did he manage to get to Stars Hollow to go house hunting without Doris noticing, where did he live during the settlement period (unless he just murdered Beenie Morrison, of course), how did he manage to take all the board games with him when he got out the window, and how has Doris managed to find his phone number? I guess his number is listed, for the last one, which seems stupid if he’s on the run from his wife.
The formidable Doris is voiced by Alex Borstein, who played Drella in Season 1.
DWIGHT: [on answering machine]Hey, it’s Dwight. Leave me a message. Namaste.
Namaste, a Hindu greeting, farewell, thank you, and acknowledgement. It literally means “bowing to you” in Sanskrit, often translated as “I bow to the divine in you”. It is usually spoken with a slight bow and hands pressed together, palms touching and fingers pointing upwards, thumbs close to the chest.
Dwight using this as his answering machine greeting is probably meant to reflect his embracing of “exotic” cultures in his search for a new, more relaxed life. I can see him signing up for Miss Patty’s yoga classes.
LORELAI: Dad, I explained this to Mom and I’ll explain it to you. I’m not sixteen, I don’t live with you anymore, I’ve been making my own decisions, romantic and otherwise, for a long time now and you can play all the golf you want but the subject better be letting chicks into the Augusta Golf Club because my love life is officially off limits.
Augusta National Golf Club in Augusta, Florida, first opened in 1932. Since 1934, the club has played host to the annual Masters Tournament, one of the four men’s major championships in professional golf, and the only major played each year at the same course. It is considered to be one of the best golf courses in the US.
There was a controversy over the club’s refusal to admit female members to the club. Following the discord, two club members resigned, and pressure on corporate sponsors led the club to broadcast the 2003 and 2004 tournaments without commercials. The controversy was discussed by the International Olympic Committee when re-examining whether golf meets Olympic criteria of a “sport practiced without discrimination with a spirit of friendship, solidarity and fair play”.
The club extended membership to Condoleezza Rice and Darla Moore in 2012, so it now has at least two female members. The Augusta National Women’s Amateur Championship began being co-hosted by Augusta National in 2019.
RICHARD: Before this unfortunate incident, Sally Wallington always received the first cup of tea. When she was suddenly demoted, your mother moved up to the prime tea spot, and she’s held that spot ever since. Now, she’s very proud of that spot, and now she’s afraid that this little incident may jeopardize it.
When Richard phones Lorelai, it is to tell her that she has to go to the concert with Peyton, because otherwise she may jeopardise Emily’s social standing in the Hartford community ie receiving the first cup of tea at DAR meetings.
Lorelai thinks this sounds ridiculous, and Richard agrees – but he doesn’t care. No matter how silly it may sound, it’s important to Emily to have that first cup of tea, and Richard will do anything he can to help her get it.
This provides Lorelai with another viewpoint on the subject, that Emily’s feelings are more important because a dispute with Peyton’s mother will have long-term effects on Emily’s social standing and happiness. On the other hand, for Lorelai to go on one boring date with Peyton is only a few hours out of her life – and it’s at a David Bowie concert, which Lorelai wants to see anyway, with less chance for listening to Peyton drone on than at dinner.
As Lorelai said Peyton was equally bored and unhappy on their date, I can think of an obvious solution – Peyton and Lorelai could just pretend to go on a date with each other in order to keep everyone happy. Or Lorelai could cancel the date with some polite fiction, such as a sudden illness or urgent situation. Apparently this is too simple a fix.
LORELAI: Dwight says it needs it now, and if we let that lawn die, he’s gonna vibe us for the rest of our lives.
Vibe, short for “vibration”. Slang meaning the atmosphere or aura felt belonging to a place, person, or object, often made specific as “good vibes” or “bad vibes”. Originally New Age jargon from the 1960s.
Lorelai seems to fear that if Dwight’s lawn dies, he will give Lorelai “bad vibes” forever. Dwight doesn’t actually seem the type to do that, but nobody wants to kill their new neighbour’s lawn.
LORELAI: It seems that Dwight has been checking the weather reports and Stars Hollow is going to be extra sunny for the next few days, so he was wondering if instead of watering the lawn twice a day for fifteen minutes, we could water it three times a day for ten minutes.
It’s now well into October, but somehow Stars Hollow in Connecticut is going to be “extra sunny” for days? So much so that the lawn watering routine needs to be altered? The start of this episode was all grey skies, autumn leaves, pumpkins, and scarecrows … now it’s hot enough to kill a lawn. Climate change, Gilmore Girls style.
LORELAI: Salsa with me. Pretend I’m Antonio Banderas.
Antonio Banderas, previously discussed. As it happens, Antonio Banderas did end up doing a movie that revolved around Latin dance – Take the Lead, in 2006, where he plays a dance instructor [pictured].
Salsa [pictured] is an energetic Latin dance, associated with the music genre of the same name, which was first popularised in the United States in the 1960s in New York City. Salsa is an amalgamation of Cuban dances, such as mambo, pachanga and rumba, as well as American dances such as swing and tap. It was primarily developed by Puerto Ricans and Cubans living in New York in the late 1960s and early 1970s. Cardio salsa is a high-impact fitness routine that uses salsa dancing to keep the heart rate elevated at the same level it would be during jogging.
It is never said where Lorelai got the cardio salsa tape that she shows Rory, but it’s interesting that Rory bought Michel a cardio salsa tape for Christmas in 2000 (Season 1). Has he re-gifted it to Lorelai? Rory never says that she recognises it, but she certainly doesn’t seem impressed.
The Annotated Gilmore Girls 