Footnotes to the TV series
In “Secrets and Loans”, Emily told Lorelai she would be holding her DAR meetings at the Independence Inn from then on. Here we learn that wasn’t an empty threat, because here we are months later, and the DAR are due the next Tuesday, at 3 pm. They seem meet on the second Tuesday of each month.
LORELAI: If you had your way, Mother, you’d lock us up like veal. That’s what she wants, veal children.
Veal is the meat of calves, rather than beef, which comes from adult cattle. In the past, many calves raised for veal in North America were raised in small crates, often tethered, which is what I think Lorelai means by keeping them locked up like veal. In the 2000s, this cruel practice began gradually to be abandoned in favour of slightly less cruel practices, and by 2017, all members of the American Veal Association raised their veal calves untethered in pens, not crates.
Note that Lorelai implies that both herself and Rory are Emily’s children, as if they are sisters, rather than mother and daughter, and as if Lorelai is still a child.
(Lorelai enjoyed a meal of ossobucco made by Max, a veal dish).
LORELAI: She had nothing to do with Jess coming over. Believe me, she did not want him there.
DEAN: That’s what she told me. And Rory wouldn’t lie, right?
As Lorelai and Dean assure each other that good, honest, pure Rory (the sweetest kid in the world) would never lie about wanting Jess, they watch through the window as Rory giggles and flirts with him while paying for breakfast.
Rory was certainly being truthful about not inviting Jess to the house, or even inviting him to dinner – he invited himself, and manipulated the situation so he could stay. But as for not wanting him there, actively wishing he hadn’t come? Well … if that wasn’t a lie to Dean, then she is definitely lying to herself.
And it’s going around, because Dean and Lorelai are desperately lying to themselves as well.
RORY: I don’t think Luke knew anything about the food last night … Which means you lied about why you came over.
Rory is positively delighted to discover that Jess came over with the food just because he wanted to. In her mind, she is only enjoying catching him out in a lie and watching him squirm, but on some level she must also be happy to know that Jess actively sought out her company for an evening.
LORELAI: Wow, he must’ve been crazy mad last night.
RORY: I’d say that was a fair assessment.
Apparently knowing that her daughter’s boyfriend was in an insane rage the night before isn’t something Lorelai feels she needs to worry about! And now Dean has taken Rory hostage for the entire day, and she has to have dinner with his family as well. Doesn’t she look thrilled about it?
LORELAI: So, Paris looked a little green this morning.
RORY: Yeah, she had a sugar/carb hangover of monumental proportions.
Or perhaps she was suffering the effects of eating dairy, which she is allergic to? Also, sugar is actually a carb. It’s a simple carbohydrate.
LORELAI: I know, life with my mother, one step forward, five thousand steps back. It’s kinda like the spastic polka.
Spastic is an outdated term to describe people with cerebral palsy, a disorder often characterised by poor co-ordination, weak or stiff muscles, and tremors.
In America, using the words “spastic” or “spaz” to humorously describe awkwardness, clumsiness, hyperactivity, or nerdiness is not considered as shockingly offensive as it in other parts of the world. Lorelai’s comment here would be unacceptable in Britain, for example.
Polka [pictured] is a Czech folk dance which was all the rage in the mid-19th century – so much so that the phenomenon was called “polkamania”. Polka made a comeback after World War II, when many Polish refugees moved to the US. Lorelai and Rory own at least one CD of polka music.
RORY: You actually got Grandma to steal a bathrobe?
LORELAI: Although I did catch her trying to return it while I was getting the car.
What car? They went to the spa in a hired limo. Perhaps Lorelai means while she was phoning for a car to collect them, or meeting the car? Or she meant to say while she was getting in the car?
Emily panicked and tried not to go through with stealing the bathrobe, but Lorelai seems to have stopped her. That seems to be enough to satisfy Lorelai, who actually appears pretty pleased with how her time at the spa with her mother turned out (probably because they came home early).
This episode is another one where we see Lorelai and Rory in parallel situations. In “There’s the Rub”, both Lorelai and Rory have their personal boundaries disrespected.
Lorelai thinks she is being offered free vouchers to a luxury spa, only to discover what she’s really getting is a weekend away with her mother – who books every single activity for them at the same time, even a couples massage!
Meanwhile, Rory thinks she’s getting the house to herself for an evening. Paris tries to guilt trip Rory into letting her come over to study by reminding her how lonely and neglected she is. When Rory sensibly but kindly resists, Paris just turns up anyway. Then Jess arrives with food, unbidden, and invites himself to dinner, so that Rory has to ask Paris to stay the night as a chaperone. Then Dean decides to stick his nose in, despite being explicitly told to stay away. (Dean is the only character who doesn’t manipulate his way in, because he already feels entitled to Rory’s company).
If everyone had respected Lorelai and Rory’s boundaries, Lorelai would have received two vouchers for a spa weekend, and taken Sookie, and Rory would have been free to do laundry, eat Indian food, and fall asleep in front of the TV in her pyjamas. Which would be nice for them, but not exactly compelling television.
Luckily, both Gilmore girls end up gaining something by allowing others to force their way into their lives – if only the knowledge that people really do want to be closer to them.
(Note that the boundary-pushing continues even in the penultimate scene, when Kirk tries to take their table from them in the diner before they are ready to leave. After everything they’ve been through, the Gilmore girls are hogging that table, no matter what!).
EMILY: You do know, in the course of one night, you have turned me into an adulterer and a thief.
LORELAI: I’ll have you working at the Chicken Ranch by the end of the month.
The Chicken Ranch is a legal, licensed brothel about 60 miles west of Las Vegas, near the town of Pahrump, Nevada. Approximately 60 women call the Chicken Ranch “home”, with 12-15 women living there at any one time. The women usually stay there for two weeks at a time. The Chicken Ranch opened in 1976.
The Annotated Gilmore Girls 