LORELAI: No, Rory would never steal. She’s far too moral for that.
This is a complete, utter, and quite deliberate lie. Rory and Lorelai stole glasses from a Holiday Inn together, she boasted to Lorelai about stealing a towel from the country club she went to with Richard, and in this very episode, she tells Lorelai to steal soap from the spa before she comes home. Apart from trying to make Emily feel special and as if they could have a bond that Lorelai and Rory don’t, Lorelai doesn’t want to tarnish the image Emily has of the perfect angel granddaughter.
EMILY: I wasn’t taught to be best friends with my daughter … I was taught to be a role model for my daughter … I did what I thought was right. I did what I thought I had to do to protect you, and because of this we have no relationship.
And “there’s the rub” – Emily wants to have a good relationship with Lorelai, the kind of friendship she thinks Lorelai has with Rory. And yet she was taught that mothers and daughters aren’t friends, and that she has to set an example for Lorelai, not relax and have fun with her. And even though Lorelai is in her thirties and a mother herself, Emily doesn’t know how to stop being a mother, and start being a friend to her daughter. Lorelai being stuck as a perpetual teenager means that Emily can’t grow and develop either.
It’s frustrating, because clearly they are capable of having a good time together. Chad said they were the two people having the most fun at the bar. However, Lorelai has a plan for them to do a bonding activity together – steal the bathrobes from the spa. That’s her idea of a mother-daughter bonding baby step. Hm, speaking of being a role model for your daughter …
EMILY: You knew this whole evening made me uncomfortable and yet you kept pushing.
LORELAI: I was trying to do everything right. You manipulated me into taking this trip and still I came. You told me I was acting like a teenager, so I tried to be nicer. You said you needed to eat, so I made that happen.
EMILY: Yes, by sitting me at a bar where you practically forced me to engage in inappropriate behaviour.
Emily and Lorelai, who have been in an almost constant state of friction since they left for the spa, finally let loose on each other. You can see that each of them have valid points of aggrievement.
Lorelai feels that she was manipulated into going on a spa weekend with her mother – Emily never gave her a chance to decide for herself by asking, “Lorelai, would you care to go to a spa with me this weekend?”. When there was nothing appetising for dinner, she helped her mother get the courage to go out for steak, and when there was no table available, she suggested they eat at the bar instead, where they had a good time together. When a man asked her mother to dance, she made it seem like no big deal to accept if she chose, and now everything is Lorelai’s fault. Again.
Emily feels that Lorelai has been incredibly ungrateful and immature, sulking and sniping like the spoiled teenager she still is inside while being treated to a luxury spa weekend, and being driven there in a limousine. All things that Emily has organised for Lorelai as a fun treat so they can spend some time bonding – she even cancelled Friday Night Dinner for Lorelai’s benefit, so that she won’t feel that “Ugh, I have to have dinner with my mother and go to a spa with her all weekend!”. Emily agreed to going out for steak, even though she didn’t feel comfortable about it, and sitting at the bar wasn’t respectable.
When Chad asked her to dance, she didn’t really want to as it seemed disloyal to Richard, but felt pressured into it by Lorelai. Although it was okay at first, when Chad got a little too intimate, she was expecting Lorelai to act like a good friend and save her. She didn’t. Lorelai figured her mother was an adult and could handle a man coming on too strongly, the way she would have. She left Emily to sink or swim.
Rory had Paris to protect her from Jess coming onto her, and from Dean’s temper. Emily could have used a friend like that, and unfortunately, Lorelai wasn’t that friend for her.
EMILY: I don’t know why I let you take me to this chophouse in the first place. I don’t go to chophouses.
Chophouse is a word for an inexpensive steakhouse, now so dated that it is considered a historical term more than anything else, although it’s been chosen as part of the name for several grills and steakhouses. The word has been used since at least the 18th century. There is an implication that a “chophouse” is of lower quality, but Emily thought her steak was the best she’d ever had, and the restaurant Lorelai chose doesn’t look super cheap.
ELAYNE: And now it’s time for my favourite part of the evening – our salute to the Chairman of the Board.
MARTY: I sure hope that’s not b-o-r-e-d.
A possible allusion to the 1979 song, “I’m Bored”, by punk icon Iggy Pop, from his album New Values. The album was well received, but “I’m Bored” only charted in Australia, where it reached a modest #68 in the charts. However, the album was most successful in New Zealand, reaching #18 – the only country where it was in the Top 20.
This is the song playing at the bar when Emily and Lorelai first walk in together. It’s a jazz standard with music by Jimmy McHugh and lyrics by Dorothy Fields, introduced by Adelaide Hall at the Blackbird Revue in New York, 1928, which later opened on Broadway.
Come Fly With Me
This is the song which is announced as a “salute to the Chairman of the Board”. It’s a 1958 song with music by Jimmy Heusen and lyrics by Sammy Cahn. It was written for Frank Sinatra, the title track of his 1958 album, and became part of his concert repertoire.
Fly Me to the Moon
This is the song which plays when Chad, the “silver fox”, asks Emily to dance. It’s a 1954 song by Bart Howard, originally recorded by Kaye Ballard the same year. Frank Sinatra’s 1964 version is the best known, and became associated with NASA’s Apollo missions to the Moon. “Fly Me to the Moon” was inducted into the Songwriter’s Hall of Fame in 1999.
Someone To Watch Over Me
Previously discussed. This is the song which Emily and Chad dance to. It’s a sign that Emily desperately needs Lorelai to watch out for her – which she fails to do.
Stayin’ Alive
The song which plays while Emily and Lorelai argue about whose fault everything has been. It’s a 1977 song written and performed by The Bee Gees for the soundtrack to the film, Saturday Night Fever. The song was a smash hit around the world, going to #1 in the US and multiple other countries, and #4 in the UK. Considered one of the best songs of all time, it was one of the Bee Gees’ signature songs.
The songs at the bar are performed by Marty and Elayne (Roberts), a famous husband-wife lounge act who performed at The Dresden Room, a Hollywood landmark, for 38 years. They also make an appearance in the 1996 film Swingers. Marty passed away in January of this year, aged 89.
EMILY: This is either the greatest steak I’ve ever eaten, or I’m so hungry, I’m delirious. Pass the horseradish, please.
LORELAI: I never knew you were a spicy girl.
EMILY: Oh, believe me, I can handle my heat. One summer when we were first married, your father and I stayed at this little village in Thailand where we spent two weeks eating viciously hot chillies and skinny-dipping.
Emily and Richard would have visited Thailand in the late 1960s, considered to be during the Golden Age of Tourism in Thailand. Westerners had been travelling to Thailand (Siam) since the 19th century, but it was only in 1947 that the first flights from the US to Bangkok began, when Pan Am offered it as part of its around the world ticket. By the 1960s, flights to Bangkok were cheaper and shorter.
The “little village” the Gilmores stayed in was almost certainly Pattaya – originally a fishing village with a perfect crescent of beach, only 99 miles from Bangkok, on a decent road. That made it very attractive to tourists, and by the early 1960s, some development had already begun. Today it is a modern city of more than 120 000 people with a very seedy red light district, and a major pollution problem. The once-pristine beach is now considered poor quality due to sewage dumping.
It’s interesting that Emily remembers skinny-dipping with Richard for two weeks, as he later has quite a different recollection. It is just possible that it was on this summer vacation in Thailand that Lorelai was conceived – she was born in late April 1968, meaning that she could have been conceived in July-August the previous year.
Note that Emily’s enjoyment of hot horseradish on her steak parallels Rory eating her French fries dipped in pepper and hot sauce. (And her love of Indian curry!).
It’s hard for Paris to trust that someone actually likes her – her parents’ cold and neglectful behaviour have seen to that. An overture of friendship from Rory sees Paris agree to it with a smile, although she can’t help ending with a typically Paris-like threat.
RORY: I’m not sure if there is an exact definition for what we are, but I do think it falls somewhere in the bizarro friends-ish realm.
Bizarro, previously discussed, and now used by Lorelai, Jess, and Rory.
Just as Rory found it hard to define her relationship with Jess, resorting to the word “friendish” to describe it, she also finds it hard to say what Paris is to her. Classmate? Ex-bully? Frenemy? Fellow nerd? Or an actual friend? For now, the bizarro friends-ish realm must satisfy.
The Annotated Gilmore Girls 